By Popular Demand

I have it on good authority that nearly 50% of my readership (that's right, one person left a comment) has expressed interest in my plan for leading my beloved Columbus Crew to MLS glory; or, driving them into the ground, as he put it. I like to make people happy, so I will gladly oblige…

Upon learning of my availability to coach, based upon my success as a youth soccer coach, the Crew promptly sacked "Fozzy" and gave me the reigns. Immediately, I dissolved Andrulis' "chuck it and run" style of play, and molded the team into my 4-3-1-2 attacking form. With talent on top like Martino making chances for Buddle and Cunnigham, I feel like we will be able to apply some serious offensive pressure. Cunningham has my permission to be as creative as he likes, and I'm encouraging him to play forward and make runs as much as possible. I also am bringing Hejduk up into the attack from his fullback position, to utilize his athletic ability, pace, and endurance to pester the heck out of the opponent, both offensively and defensively. In the middle of the field, I have Elliot in the center, flanked by Paule on the left and Lagos on the right. National-teamer Tony Sanneh and captain Robin Fraser man the defensive center, with the aforementioned Hejduk on the right, and left-footed Denton on the opposite side of the pitch. Jon Busch, the "screamer," will be in the net for most matches, but backed up capably by Matt Jordan. My bench will primarily consist of young stars-of-the-future, whom I hope to break in slowly, like Marshall, Wingert, and Szetela, plus at times with some other youngsters with potential like Testo, Barclay, Ritch, Sutton, and Akwari. Maisonneuve, Herdsmen, and Oughton will provide veteran leadership for those youngsters, and serve as a suitable back-ups when I'm in a pinch.

My primary weakness is in the midfield, where I have some aging, but serviceable veterans (Paule, Elliot, Lagos, Maisonneuve, Oughton) backed up by inexperienced youth (Szetela, Wingert). I've been given a transfer budget of $500K, to help fill the need. That need was compounded when the dependable Manny Lagos broke his toe in training. To help fill the void, I signed Spaniard Luis Cembranos via a free transfer. His skills are comparable to Lagos, and he should provide needed depth until my youngsters get more experience.

To help my younger players get better, I've made a number of them available for loan. In addition, I transfer-listed some pricey veterans, like Fraser, Herdsmen, and Maisonneuve, none of which were too happy with my decision. Sorry boys, there's a new sheriff in town… As a matter of fact, a German club already offered me $80,000 to transfer Marshall, but I promptly rejected that overture. I'll send him away on loan for a few months for sure, but I plan on Marshall being a fixture in the defensive center for Columbus for many years to come.

I began the season by swiping the first round of the North American Cup (aka the CONCACAF Cup) with a pair of 1-0 victories. That seemed to be a shot in the arm in terms of morale for most of my squad, and a shot of $89,000 into the Crew's pocketbook. I followed those wins up with a 4-1 drubbing of Carolina in a friendly, with most of my backups doing the damage. Right now, my club is playing with excellent form, and I have no reason to believe that we won't be competitive in the next round of the North American Cup, and on into league play. Injuries could always do significant damage to well-laid plans, though, so we'll have to see how this plays out.

I'm sure you're adding my blog to your favorites folder right now, and anxiously awaiting my next report on the Crew's progress...