A Few Days Before Christmas...

Written By Jules:

On Wednesday late afternoon/early evening, I drove through downtown Elyria on my way to a meeting for work. I couldn’t help but notice the town square, always beautifully lighted for Christmas and it is no exception this year. However, my thoughts were not so much on the pretty lights and the holidays only a few days off. It was hard to feel much joy. The day before, the company I work for eliminated three positions in our department. Like most every business out there, the domino effect of the economy has hit us and due to “changing business” needs, as it was referred to, three women were told their positions were cut – effective immediately. Somehow losing your job the week before Christmas seems even more brutal. It was mentioned in our meeting that there is no good time to be told you are out of a job, but I beg to differ – it seems these cuts could have waited until after the holidays, but that was not how it was handled.
In the past month, two women I know lost their mothers – in the same week. My neighbor’s mother was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in early November. She had not been obviously ill – the diagnosis came through the investigation of a swollen ankle, which led to other tests and unbelievably, stage IV pancreatic cancer. As Thanksgiving and the pre-Christmas season came around, my neighbor and her family watched her mom rapidly dwindle away. I could only imagine the shock and grief they must have felt during the month that her mother was dying. I cannot begin to know how they are coping now, but certainly with the deep sense of pain and loss that perhaps makes their lives seem unrecognizable as they work through this rough time.
A week earlier, a young college student who works at a coffee shop I frequent lost her mom; a 51-year-old woman. She passed away in her sleep from an apparent heart attack. I saw this young girl today, back on the job for the first time since her mom died. I didn’t know what to say, except, “I’m glad you are back.” Her face was sad. We didn’t go anywhere near the discussion of her mom. She thanked me for the card I sent her. She told me that they had put a tree up but she had not bought presents. I got the feeling she didn’t want to celebrate Christmas. I can understand why. Her pain is too fresh.

There is the terrible sadness over the discovery of little Caylee Anthony’s body being positively identified this past week. There is nothing left of this beautiful little girl but her bones, tossed into a garbage bag with duct tape across her mouth. No one can comprehend this tragedy. What can you say? Caylee will not be here to celebrate Christmas with the people who did love her. So many people who didn’t even know this child feel the grief of her loss – So many people who hoped that by some miracle she was still alive. She lives on in a video made of her singing the song “You Are My Sunshine” in the voice of a toddler who cannot quite get the words or tune quite right. You can ask why over and over and there will never be an answer that makes sense.

So many people I know must feel their lives are fragmented; changed in ways they never expected, through loss of loved ones and loss of jobs. I know they are hurting. I keep them in my prayers and I hope they can move toward better times and the road will not be long and difficult. I hope that they are shown kindness and a lot of care right now – that they are not alone in their pain. I hope they are given peace, strength and hope this Christmas. I hope they will be okay.

For KP, MB, MM, RM, and JK.

And for anyone who was touched by Caylee and loved her. And for anyone who is having a hard time during this holiday season.

Take care,

Jules